A harsh experience of a widow of over five decades of marriage that culminated in undue disgrace and dishonor by her husband’s older children suspected of attempting to sell their father’s house that their father’s widow lives in.

Excerpts of interview of Madam Ajarat from Okenne, Kogi State,  married to Late Pa Ogunbajo of Ijebu-Igbo in Ogun State.

She spoke with OWOLOLA ADEBOLA

My maiden name is Ajarat Subair from Okenne in Kogi State.

 He was a produce trader that used to buy and sell cocoa and other cash crops. He came to our family farm at Abeku by J4 in Ogun State. I accompanied my late aunt who was a farmer to visit him. That is how we met. He showed interest to marry me. He was an interesting man. I was 25 years old then. He was a fatherly figure.

 It was sometime in the 1960s. I had the first child for him but died of measles. My second surviving child for him was crawling when he died in 1973.

 Upon my husband’s death, I was bequeathed to his junior sister, my late sister-in-law according to the prevalent Yoruba custom. She in turn bequeathed me to her son called “Olowo.”

I had two daughters for Olowo. The first was a handicapped daughter without lower limbs. The second, a girl too but now a woman. Both are married with children.

The first daughter for Olowo is called Lubuda. That’s physically challenged.  God blesses her with two children. I look after her and her children. The rest are on their own.

 What is your position amongst late Pa Ogunbajo’s wives?

 I’m the fifth and last wife. There were only two aged wives ahead of me. The rest two had died before I met him. I was well-accepted into the family. My immediate and extended family members love me. His mother ensured I was the closest person to her. All the children of the extended family would always come around to play in our big house then. There was enough space for them to run around.  I would cook for them all before they returned home.

 Yes I did. I had health challenges then. Fibroid threats. I was advised to marry again to reduce and possibly eliminate the threats. I had two children with my last husband. I returned to my first husband’s house to look after all my children. I stayed in the two-rooms apartment given to my first daughter as her inheritance in her father’s house.

I stayed in the same two-rooms apartment in my husband’s house while my marriage to Olowo lasted until he died.

 What led to the dispute between you and your first husband’s older children, lately?

No specific reason for the dispute. I’m not a stranger to them. I’ve known them for over five decades. My suspicion is that they want to sell the house. The surviving children of Pa Ogunbajo are advanced in age. None of them is less than 80 years old. They alleged unspeakable nonsense against me and my children. They call us all sorts of names to intimidate me and my children. In the end, they summoned me to Customary Court.  They alleged so many untrue allegations.  I defended myself in truth as I could. In the end, they pronounced me guilty.

The Court president and others did not take into account to I

nvestigate all the allegations or call for witnesses or evidence to affirm the truth of the allegations. I debunked all the allegations but they didn’t believe me.

The Court pronounced me guilty. The Court granted me only 14 days to vacate the house and relocate elsewhere. The Court says I could appeal the judgment within 30 days.

 Did you comply with the Court’s ruling?

 I was advised to comply and I wanted to. Some extended family members heard of the Court’s ruling and were astounded.  They asked me to stay in the house while they would resolve the differences in the family.

I listened to them. The family members assured me they had contacted the Court president to stay the judgment execution. They assured me to continue living in the house.

 It was a rude shock to me that I was evicted on the 23rd day after the Court’s ruling. The Court president neither honoured his words to the family members to stay the judgment execution nor wait till the due 30 days granted me to appeal the judgment. The Court bailiff and plainclothes policemen came to the house.

They hired men of the Hausa tribe brandishing cutlasses and cudgel. They ordered the Hausa men to force the door open. They threw my belongings outside. They disgraced me and my children.

 The trial took place on 23rd of January 2023 at Customary Court Holden at Ijebu-Igbo, Ijebu-North Local Government Area, Ogun State.

I was evicted on the 15th of February 2023. The third week after the ruling.

 I don’t think it is necessary. There were rumours that the Court president had been contracted to sell the house if he could succeed in evicting me and my children. The Court president is a popular estate agent around Ijebu-Igbo.

 The legal fee to challenge the ruling and the oppression is exorbitant. It is unaffordable to me and my children in this difficult time around the country. I look up to God to redress the situation for me.

I may seek legal aid from the Ogun State government to help restore my right to live in my daughter’s inherited two-rooms apartment in her father’s house. If they would sell the house, they should seek my daughter’s consent as one of my husband’s children.

 A good neighbour offered me and my children a room to stay for a while. I will move on to seek redress when I overcome the resultant trauma and the depression that becloud me daily. It is not a good way for me to end my life after five decades of marriage.